I have taken some time off of writing and, again, I am reminded I love writing, messaging, using up words, letting go of what’s in my head through a venue that works at the time. I write on paper and I love it. The motion of the pen to the paper, the typing on the blog, and the journaling that eventually someone will read.
I went back to South Dakota. First I went to North Dakota for a NSLA training. This was all day Friday and the information was wonderful to receive. It got Laurie and I connected to the vision of the 501C3 we will build. The information gave us laws to work with, etiquette of the program, code of ethics, and much more. In that 5 hours it was a training I’d never been to, a training I was nervous to venture to, especially being 10 hours from my “home” in Windsor, WI. We got done with the training Friday afternoon and still knew we wanted to go forward with our vision. Actually, it’s Laurie’s vision, and I am coming on board to learn, be available, work at and in wholeheartedly.
What I experienced after that is what I would call the three knock. I reference my beliefs as this; I believe in God and I believe in the devil (the enemy). When something is meant to be through God, from God, on His time and His will there will always be the opposite to remind you to trust God. The enemy, the negative thoughts that happen, negative, chaotic “issues” will pop up in my life. I ultimately believe God has got this “path” whatever this path is for all of us. I have a friend who references it as “It is as it should be.”
It was hot, very hot in South Dakota…everywhere I stopped I seemed to pull up to a gas pump that was marked wrong, priced wrong, and at one point I mixed different fuels together in my car. No big deal really, it just seemed odd that I was having some confusion or “issue” just getting regular gas. Then, I get to the hotel and realized I haven’t talked to a friend that I dearly love for over two days. I call him and he is upset, at me for traveling as much as I do because “what if something were to happen to you?” The fear that is gripped in this man is unreal, his concern for me, even though I travel so slow when I drive, take my time, communicate with a handful of family members every time I travel (no matter what), is still not “good enough” for my safety. In my mind…what is the big deal? People drive, everywhere, all the time. Then, the third, my daughter is on the phone with me on the day I am driving back home, the whole day. She is in complete denial of moving out of our townhouse. She has known since October of last year that I was done with the lease, she has know. Since February to go find a new, full time job, and she has seen me moving, packing up stuff, and barely being at the townhouse during my travels.
That is what I call the three knock…not major issues, but issues that come up, remind me I have to trust God to handle those situations, those conversations, those judgements that come at me from time to time from others. It’s normal, HUMAN behavior to project a concern or issue onto others. It doesn’t surprise me, when I truly believe that God has shown me a vision a year ago and I have found it 3/4ths of the way ready to do or start with Laurie, that I would come up against a spot with loved ones that “can’t let go of the old me and experience the new me.”
Letting go of what was allows space for what’s to come. It’s like telling someone they can come live with you, you don’t bring much, and all the guest drawers and closet is packed full of their space. It took three weeks for someone to “give me some space” in their guest room so I could move in for a short while. I didn’t judge, I didn’t yell or kick or scream. All I asked for was some space and when they were ready to give it to me I would be grateful.
Letting go of the past, letting go of what doesn’t serve me or others in my life from me is the best part of this adventure. I learn something new everyday, every time I go to South Dakota, and I learn to let go of what I used to do and I create a new way of being.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!
Ask, Seek, knock and God Provides 